Oh, I don't even know how to start writing this. I found out last night that my five year-old's friend was murdered in an apparent murder/suicide by his own father. The father killed the mother and the three children: a 5 year old boy, a 4 year old boy and a 2 year old girl. Tomorrow is back to school and I am going to have to talk to him about it. The school's policy is that they will not be announcing anything, but they will answer children's questions if asked - to a point. Then they will be directing them to mom and dad. I have talked to other parents and some children already know, so I have no doubt that it will come up. I cannot bear to have my child's innocence shattered, but that is what is going to happen in about 9 hours from now.
You may have heard the story, it's made national news. If not, Google Middletown, MD murder and you'll get it. I cannot comprehend how such a thing could happen. I did not know this family well, but I knew them. I sat in the parking lot after school just on Thursday asking Francie where she got those cute hairbows her daughter wears all the time because I wanted some for my little girls. She said her friend makes them and was gonna e-mail me the info. Her boy didn't show up for school Friday. So I'm gonna go ahead and claim to be one of the last people who talked to her. It freaks me out. I remember meeting her husband at their son's birthday party. He was very nice. They were a wonderful family and you could see he was a good father. It's crazy.
The first time I met Francie she was inviting my boy to a birthday party for hers. Later I had a question and e-mailed her. I thought I was mistaken when I found out she was inviting my whole family to the party, not just my son. She said, no I'm inviting all of you, I know my husband and I wouldn't want to give up our family time on the weekend so we wanted families to come all together. How wonderful and thoughtful is that? But what really impressed me is that she signed her e-mail "God bless, Francie". Most people don't profess their faith to casual acquaintances like that, but she did. I thought it was awesome. She had the most beautiful children and it is a truly a loss.
I am so sick I can hardly function. When will the world ever seem normal again? I prayed the Divine Mercy chaplet all day - for ALL of the deceased. I cannot imagine what demons possessed that man, but I am so sorry that it came to this. Jesus has already won the war so why does Satan contine to wage battles???
Please pray and pray hard. For this family, for the family members left to grieve, for the grandparents of these beautiful children (it was the grandfather who discovered the gruesome scene, can you imagine that???), and for all these little children in the preschool whose worlds will be changed forever.
9 comments:
I am praying! What a heart wrenching tragedy. I will also pray that you find peace during this difficult time and that the Holy Spirit will speak through you when you talk to your children.
Oh Cassie. About 3 years ago, a student in my classroom and his brother were murdered by their father. It was a bitter custody battle. The father had an excellent reputation around town, but obviously was eaten up by evil. This boy was such a special little boy, well liked by all. I miss him so much. I was eight months pregnant with Frack at the time and a whirlwind of emotions.
Call your school this morning and see if they are providing counselors. Each school district has counselors who specialize in situations not really like this, but in tragic situations nonetheless. 2 counselors were in my classroom for 2 weeks following this event. They were there on the spot to answer any questions my class had. We made memorials, wrote letters, cried, etc. Parents were encouraged to tell their students what happened, but professionals were there to talk to the kids when needed.
When your son gets home, talk to him about this man who was sick. He was troubled and needed help. It doesn't make the situation right and he is answering to his own fate as we speak.
I know it doesn't make this any easier...trust me. I lived through it, too. I will be praying for you to find words to ease your child's pain and for this family. So sad.
Yes, it's all over the news in MD. Tragic and just so sad. It is a very different kind of grieving as opposed to a child dying from an accident or illness. Very different. Quite shocking and terrible - there's bitterness and questions and anger. Jesus did win the battle, but . . . these things happen because we still have free will. Obviously, evil entered in one way and festered. I cannot imagine the pain for the extended family. The whole family gone just like that . . . Cassie, I will pray for you and your children . . . ask the Holy Spirit to give you the words to say and ears to listen during this tough time for your children. God bless.
oh, Cassie...what can I say? How horrible...
I cannot begin to imagine what you are feeling now, let alone the poor family left behind!
Please know that you are all in my Rosary, my Visits, any Masses I go to...
Asking the Holy Spirit is the BEST thing you can do, but don't forget to also include Our Lady and the Guardian Angels of all you speak to ~ they are there to help!
God bless.
I have prayed for them this morning... oh, how horrible. My stomach is sick.
I don't think you should have to explain that the man was sick or anything at all... your 5-year-old certainly doesn't need details. Knowing that his friend died in a tragic accident is probably quite enough.
This story has me heartsick. I thank you for sharing this with us, I know how incredibly hard this must be for you and your community. We will keep them in our prayers as well as your family.
wow, how awful! Praying for everyone in your community...
Prayers for your family and theirs. Very sad.
Cassie, this is just heart breaking. I am so sorry for your family and all who are dealing with this. I'm sure you found the right words to talk to you children with, with God's help we can make it as parents.
I remember when I was young my Uncle commited suicide and it was a confusing time. My mom found the right words. God Bless you!
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